Friday, July 1, 2011

Instant Gratification

I live in a world of instant gratification.  I turn on the TV and get over 500 channels and if I don't like what's playing on TV I can always hop onto Netflix and get a plethora of movies at my fingertips.  I text my friends and get immediate responses back.  I carry a phone with me at all times which gives me access to my email and the internet.  If I have a question, I don't think about it very long, I just google the answer.  I live a life of information overload that rewards me with the right answers pretty much 24/7.  As I'm writing this blog I'm simultaneously checking my facebook and looking up words in a thesaurus so that I don't repeat the word gratification too many times.

When does all this easy access technology not help me?  After a good first date.  Believe me, I want to put down the phone and be that all too elusive young woman, a mystery to be unfolded, but instead I end up straining to hear the all too elusive bubble pop noise my phone makes when it gets a text message.  My mind swirls with questions: Should I call first?  Should I wait a couple of days? Should I even say anything at all? And then of course I google those questions and end up scrolling the yahoo boards and their inane responses from 14-year-olds avoiding their math lectures (gurl if he be waitin' then don't be datin') and 40-year-old men that seem to have way too much time on their hands (I always send flowers immediately after a first date and possibly a lock of my hair).  I get so caught up in my split-second answer binge that I actually forget that the moments of uncertainty, quiet, and waiting are what make relationships into relationships.

Not many stories of romance or true love start with, "well, he blew up my phone all week and I knew it was love."  They start with hesitation and excitement for what may or may not come next.  If a man pays too much attention to me at the beginning of an affair, I'm supremely annoyed.  I instantly feel like this person has no respect for my time and thinks that it should be spent discussing how late he worked or why broccoli is not his favorite vegetable.  Well, I have news for you, I may be sitting in my pajamas on Friday night watching Indecent Proposal for the second time in a row, but I most certainly do not have time to text you back, "yeah, sucks to work late and I like broccoli but only with a lot of melted cheese."

Even though I love having all the answers all the time, I really don't want that from the beginning of what may or not be someone I'm willing to share a bathroom with.  The best part of falling in love is slowly finding out about someone and figuring out if they are someone you want to continue spending time with or want to avoid at all costs.   I want to be living each step of my life and be happy with it, not waiting for my phone to light up with Mr. Potential's number.  It doesn't mean I won't be happy to hear back about date number two, but it does mean that I won't be stressing if it never happens.  The old saying goes, good things happen two those who wait, or in my case, to she who has as much fun as possible and leaves the waiting to the people serving up her next mojito.


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